Wesley turns 3 weeks tomorrow! I can't believe how fast the last 3 weeks have gone. My baby is almost one month old! Ahh!! We've recently run into a problem, so it seems...
It started in the hospital shortly after Wesley was born. I was learning all the tricks of the trade of breastfeeding. That first night we took Wesley to the nursery so we could get in some sleep. They brought him in for a middle of the night feeding. We took him back to the nursery for a couple more hours of sleep and then the following morning they returned our lovely boy. We decided we would follow the same pattern for the second and last night we were in the hospital. The last morning we were there they brought our sweet Wesley to us but this time he came bearing gifts- a pacifier. No, the nurses didn't just automatically put a pacifier in his mouth but they gave one to us as a "just in case he needs this." Sometime after they left the room, two breastfeeding consultants came by for one last visit. When they saw the paci, they immediately became distraught. Without telling me straight up to NEVER USE A PACIFIER they pretty much implied that it would put a huge damper on our ability to breastfeed.
Well I think it was our first night home that I started to notice Wesley's tendency to root, whether he was hungry or full. The nurses had informed me that some babies just need to suck. They have a desire that needs to be fulfilled and it doesn't necessarily mean they are hungry. So after a few feedings and a noticeable "need to suck" we decided to "pacify." He didn't really enjoy the pacifier they provided so my mom went out and bought a different kind for him.
This one he loves. So much so that he has a hard time going to sleep without it. You see I've created a monster out of this pacifier. He gets so upset without the paci in his mouth that he tends to wake up when it falls out when he FINALLY gets to sleep. It's become a problem. Not to mention that we are on day 5 of "cry it out" sleep training and the poor guy just wants his paci.
By the way, he's been crying off and on for the last hour and 29 minutes.. Without a pacifier, too.
So what are your thoughts? Do I keep the paci or no? Why/Why not? Also, did you do the "cry it out" method with your kids? How'd it work for y'all?
So... on the whole pacifier issue... do not believe them when they tell you that a pacifier will affect your breastfeeding. I know LOTS of people (my sisters included) who used binkies and were still able to breastfeed without a problem. Blake and I have breastfeeding issues but that has more to do with him getting frustrated by how little I produce than anything else... So the issue with the binky is really more of whether or not you're comfortable with him being dependent on it and are willing to have the fight later on when he's too old and you need to take it away from him. We let Blake have one partially because I think it's so dang cute! But really it's any easy way to calm him down while we're out and if we're out and about and he's tired I can just stick it in his mouth and he'll go right to sleep. Blake will spit it out when he falls asleep and will sleep just fine without it. If you do have a baby that wakes up if it falls out, you have to decide if it's worth it to wake up every time he spits out a binky. That would probably mostly depend on how often he spits it out. Blake loves to play with his tongue so he accidentally pushes it out ALL the time. In my opinion, letting him have it isn't going to cause him any long term harm as long as you're aware and willing to have the fight with him in a year (or whenever) when he needs to give it up and know that they're will probably be a few rough days during that time. But such is motherhood.
ReplyDeleteOn the whole "cry it out" issue. We did that with Blake around 7 weeks. Some people will tell you not to do it until 6 weeks to 2 months because at that point they're still needing to eat too often and so it won't do any good. However, you know your baby and what he needs. If you know that he is fed and changed and there is nothing truly wrong with him, it won't do any harm letting him cry it out. Blake did pretty well when we let him cry it out to put himself to sleep. He was getting to a point he didn't want to sleep unless it was with someone which was just too hard. We did about a week of letting him cry himself to sleep. Most nights he'd cry for anywhere from 5-20 min and then go to sleep. We did have a couple of nights where he fought it harder and was up for longer. But now he'll fall asleep great anywhere and is sleeping for 5-6 hour stretches at night and 3-4 during the day. What I have found about the "cry it out" method is that it won't do any good at all if he's not pretty tired, so that means he doesn't always get put to bed at the same time every night. It's usually between 7 and 10 though. Just remember, he's still super young and every baby is different. There are things you can do to help him, but you can't expect them to be on too much of a schedule right at the beginning. I'm sure you've heard this a thousand times, but sleep when he sleeps. And try (this is the really hard part) to put him down sometimes when he sleeps so he gets used to sleeping without someone there. Okay... that was my (really really long) 2 cents. Feel free to talk to me ANY TIME because we're in pretty much the same boat. I have NO idea what I'm doing, but I'm going through the same things so maybe we can figure some of this out together. You are a FABULOUS mommy! Love and miss you tons!
ReplyDeleteWE used a pacifier and have been having problems with breastfeeding, but I think it was because we gave him the bottle too often and he is spoiled, so I've almost entirely given up on breastfeeding and he is three months. I attribute it not to the pacifier but having to supplement him with formula since he was born and so I think he figured "why work hard if I'm just going to get the bottle." So he became a lazy sucker and was never satisfied after I would breastfeed him. So I have basically given up and am now pumping and botle feeding with formula and BM. It kinda sucks, but maybe better luck next time. I don't se anything wrong with the pacifier, but it is strang that he would wake up immediately of it falling out...that sucks. Maybe hold him until he falls into a deep sleep (stops sucking, paci falling out) and then put him down to sleep. I would do this with Ethan, and it worked pretty good. Now he doesn't really even take it anymore, he'll just fall asleep when we rock him. It really is all trial and error to figure out what your baby likes. It was so hard the first two months, but trust me it gets better. Your're doing great and good luck with the BF ing. It's a real committment. Crying it our at his age is a little young I think, maybe wait until he's at least two months. When they are that yong it doesn't really work...we've tried. Anyway good luck!
ReplyDeleteSavanna breastfed and used a pacifier till she was 1. One day she just forgot about it and quit, but She loved that thing, and it helped with her gas and helped her sleep. It never dampened her breastfeeding. Now william hated the pacifier. he was completely content without one.
ReplyDeleteEvery baby is different, but sometimes they don't know how to pacify themselves, and the paci helps. I loved the pacifier, If it makes them happy, I was more than happy to give it to them. DOn't worry about him getting too attached to it, one day you'll look back and say, Hey! Remember when wesley LOVED his paci? I miss those days.
I miss those days.